Thursday, March 15, 2012


ONLINE RELATIONSHIP: REAL OR FANTASY?






Online dating is becoming a common sight in our society these days.
This phenomenon is not surprising at all; chat rooms and social networks have allowed many of us to talk and voice our opinions freely; simply because, these sites provide a sense of anonymity and disinhibition. People are more willing to self-disclose online—because more often than not, it is the people in our lives who are the ones causing our problems; also, we are afraid we would be judged by those around us. Friendships are then forged; and, relationships formed. Yet the question lies: Are online relationships real? Or are they simply based on fantasy?

While some people can argue that we should never “dismiss online relationships as fantasy”—because real feelings are involved, as seen from the example of Thomas Montgomery who became so jealous of his online partner being involved with his co-worker and shot him dead—I feel that online relationships are no more than a figment of our imagination of the ideal relationship.
Why so, you would ask?

Joseph Walther’s hyperpersonal theory would actually explain my point:
1)  Online senders often carefully emphasize those aspects of self which make them attractive to others; thus, increasing their appeals.  
2) They edit their messages before sending them, creating high-quality conversations.

By putting forth only the most ideal characteristics of one self to the other party, coupling with the lack of emphasis on physical presence—which promotes free and genuine conversation, this makes it such that there is no real or clear understanding of the person you are “dating”. So, is this still considered as dating when the most fundamental thing to have in a relationship is to understand and be real to each other?

Such relationships are most probably able to survive for a short while; yet in the long term they would start to feel the strain, especially when both parties want to get serious and move on to having a relationship in real life. This is because real life relationship is another whole new level of challenge to be faced such as dealing with immediate emotions. They might then realise that communication between them is not as easy as it seems online.

Below is a site that teaches you how to maintain an online relationship!


 
What do you think? Online relationships: effective, or not? (; 

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